Funny jokes about lawyers, courts and judges. Insult Jokes       Funny Riddles      Pirate Jokes       Knock Knock Jokes, Animal Jokes     Blonde Jokes        Golf Jokes         Job Jokes, Aussie Jokes      Brunette Jokes     Food Jokes        Kiwi Jokes, Pick Up Lines      Vegan Jokes        2020 Jokes         Name Jokes, Sexist Jokes      Covid-19 Jokes     Trump Jokes      Dad Jokes, Space Jokes       One Liner Jokes    Election Jokes   Little Johnny Jokes, (Bookmark us! Funny lawyer jokes. “I want to see Valerie,” the man replied. the lawyer asks. “May I help you?” she asked. Here are funny lawyer jokes and puns. Sadly, he lost his case. Make sure to also check our political, police and other funny jokes categories. “Would you say you’re honest?”, “Honest?” replies Peterson. # … 20 / 75. A: Lawyer's don't think they're funny, and no one else thinks they're jokes. The rest are true … They always take things literally. Memorize these funny jokes for National Tell a Joke Day! What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? Lawyers are often the butt of jokes throughout the world. Why did God invent lawyers? Check out real comedians’ favourite jokes. Funny Jokes; Bar Jokes; Corny Jokes; Dirty Jokes; Lawyer Jokes; Long Jokes ; Naughty Jokes; Hilarious Dirty Best Lawyer Joke Of The Day: Getting A Date. As you can see,” I finished, “there are a lot of people involved in making this system work.”, At that point, the prisoner raised his cuffed hands and said, “Yeah, but I’m the one who makes it all happen.”. A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him. The vacuum cleaner keeps the dirtbag on the inside. Impress a history buff with these hilarious history jokes. The Best Jokes about Lawyers ... How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? Let’s be honest; lawyers make easy targets when it comes to humor. See more ideas about Lawyer jokes, Legal humor, Lawyer. Did you hear about the lawyer who sued the funeral company over the coffin? '” — Conan O’Brien. Why did god make rats before making lawyers? Funny Lawyer Jokes. Lawyer’s question: Have you lived in this town all your life? Jokes about Lawyers. Please contact us for more information! Quinn, I have reviewed this case very carefully,” the divorce court. I guess my soul is pretty healthy because I find myself hilarious. The Best "Out Of Office" E-Mail Auto-Replies; Chuck Norris Facts; Name of Race Horse; Bookmark. SHARE. What do you call 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean...funny! Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious looking bear. 0. Here are funny lawyer jokes and puns. -- What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? If I do win it, you get nothing." The lawyer was having difficulty reading the small print on some legal docs, so his doctor prescribed some contract lenses. A: After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood. A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. Law suits. Q: What are lawyers good for? Noté /5. As a judge, I was sentencing criminal defendants when I saw a vaguely familiar face. A: They both look good hanging from a tree. A bad lawyer lets the case go on for plenty of years. Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? When my 88-year-old mother was called for jury duty, she had to submit to questioning by the opposing lawyers. Read the best lawyer jokes and much more related to law on Jokerz. Check out the best wedding jokes of all time. Quick, Funny Jokes! These hilarious Tweets are guaranteed to make you grin! Lawyers are allegedly the worst. Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty. The defence attorney took a different approach, however. Q: How are an apple and a lawyer alike? “He’s lying!” he yelled. What is the difference between a good lawyer and an excellent lawyer? I was a brand-new attorney in practice alone, and I had a likewise inexperienced secretary fresh out of high school. Add Comments Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter. -- What's the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer? THE COMPLETE LIST OF FUNNY lawyer JOKES: 1 - A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counte... More ››. A: A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. Story Jokes. Absolutely hillarious gay one-liners! “And every now and then. A great lawyer knows the judge. A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. Ok, just easing y’all into this list of twenty jokes about (us) and our state. The judge listened attentively while I gave him a long, plausible explanation. November 6, 2019 Updated December 8, 2020. As I sat with other prospective jurors listening to a woman drone on about how long the process was taking, a judge and two lawyers passed by, giving me a big hello. A secretary, a paralegal and a lawyer in a Minnesota law firm are walking through Como Park on … I had an attorney write my living trust,” she responded. ). 100 characters remaining. What my daddy does? A: The caterer. The lawyer was having difficulty reading the small print on some legal docs, so his doctor prescribed some contract lenses. Photo: RD.ca . Perfect to tell your attorney or lawyer in or out of court. (2/27/2011) A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. Peterson,” she says. That set off the malcontent: “Just how long have you been serving jury duty?”. When asked, "What is a contingent fee?" Mateus Campos Felipe/Unsplash. Only three. A: You would have to ask her. See more ideas about Lawyer jokes, Legal humor, Lawyer. 'Good', said the man, 'In that case I'll have a whisky, and a lawyer for my alligator'. A: Three, One to climb the ladder. The Great Barrister reef. 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