Because they haven't explored their emotional development, many of them aren't aware that they superimpose their childhood emotions on to their adult life. So why is EI so hard to embrace in our day-to-day lives? Emotional maturity is not "intellectual," but refers to a higher state of self-awareness, beyond "intelligence" where one is guided by one's senses, intuition and heart. Growing up is about developing Emotional Intelligence (understanding of human emotions) and Emotional Maturity (EM), the ability to use and apply Emotional Intelligence (EI) to connect more deeply and authentically with yourself and others.. Peter Vajda does a wonderful job of explaining the process of growing up in his article on Emotional Intelligence and Emotional Maturity. When we are not drawn into the drama of the information coming our way, we are able to view it from the transparent emotional bubble I spoke about in the beginning. A #TwoMinuteTakeAWay about the difference between Intelligence vs. maturity when it comes to emotions. Emotional intelligence is not identical to emotional maturity. This emotional intelligence test will evaluate several aspects of your emotional intelligence and will suggest ways to improve it. It isn't until we are about 25-years-old that our brains are fully developed, and we're capable of understanding consequences, using sound judgment, and practicing emotional maturity (also called “emotional intelligence“). And we ought to know that when we bury our emotions, we bury them alive. How do you feel when others challenge or disagree with you, or give you feedback? Five principles underlie emotional maturity: The first step to Emotional Intelligence is to understand your own emotions. Why? Since Emotional Intelligence is the understanding of emotions, Emotional Maturity is the application of that knowledge. Starks defines psychological maturity as “being able to accept the reality of people and things as they are, without needing them to be other than that.” To paraphrase a Native American adage: “The art of living in peace with that which we cannot change, the courage to change that which should be changed, no matter what it takes, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Along with this realistic attitude toward life, mature people also possess these healthy character traits: 1. We accept our experience as it is. | Powered by SedaSoft, Why �how are you?� is such an important question, The group excluded from diversity programs, Coping with COVID restrictions this winter, Emotionally intelligent people make better workers, The danger and pleasure in being yourself. The Ultimate Test of Emotional Maturity - Articles from The School of Life, formally The Book of Life, a gathering of the best ideas around wisdom and emotional intelligence. Many Adults Never Learn The Language of Emotional Maturity. Emotional intelligence is the ability to manage and control stress and anxiety, motivation, hope and optimism in the face of obstacles on the way to the target. Few of us allow our emotions to just be - watching, witnessing and observing them and asking, "what are you teaching me, about me?". is a seminar leader, workshop facilitator and speaker. The difference between the two is important. Your maturity and immaturity are products of physical age, training and trauma. Without this understanding, it's very hard to separate our present from our past - "that was then; this is now". I also give you tips on how to get back to that healthy level! One of the key aspects of Emotional Maturity is the ability to delay gratification for a more convenient or appropriate time. Merriam-Webster defines the state of … We learn that around the age of seven, our psychological and emotional "programming" is set. Emotional Intelligence: Maturity vs. Immaturity. (1) There are also six levels of emotional maturity. What is being mature? Emotional maturity is defined by the ability to manage our emotions and take full responsibility for our actions. Once you understand your own emotions, you can better understand the emotions of other people. Emotional maturity is the ability to be comfortable with a wide range of intense or conflicting emotions (whether positive or negative). Blaming others is no longer a strategy they use to make themselves feel safe. Next post: 5 Main Components of Emotional Intelligence, 5 Main Components of Emotional Intelligence. Every negative emotion we experience is a childhood emotion overlaid on a current person, circumstance, place, event or object. Emotional Intelligence and Emotional Maturity are two terms often used interchangeably which can cause confusion. Even when an individual has worked to improve their emotional intelligence, they often experience a type of disconnect in real-life situations. Emotional maturity is characterized by five principles: No question details. They work in tandem in relationships. They may have learned the concepts of EI at an intellectual level, but they still find it hard to manage their emotions or emotional reactivity and quickly revert to old, self-destructive emotional habits and patterns when certain triggers are pulled. For Executive Coaching or Workshops for your company on Emotional Intelligence, contact Inspire at 317-842-8881 today. Do you ever find yourself feeling fearful, angry or anxious? Those with emotional maturity are sensitive, perceptive, empathetic, receptive, and attentive to the needs of themselves and others. They can be quiet, withdrawn, defensive, argumentative or grandiose. 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