Reproductive health problems According to the statistics, the main reason why many couples decide to adopt children is infertility. Adoption is a difficult, lifelong journey for all involved — adoptive parents, birth parents and adoptees. Posted on June 4, 2018 April 3, 2019 by Aurora. Fertility problems, trouble in conceiving due to a late marriage are problems that might hinder begetting. In the meantime, keep reading to find out some of the most common misguided reasons that people think adoption is best for them. Perhaps the child’s was orphaned, or his/her parents cannot care for them (the reasons for this could be one of many, such as addiction). In the meantime, keep reading to find out some of the most common misguided reasons that people think adoption is best for them. Start Your Adoption Journey Today! 7. Why do People adopt? If you adopt a child from the welfare system, the child will most likely be over the age of three. Most of the reasons are good ones, but some are really bad ones. A child is not there to keep you company; you are the one there to care for them. Adoptive parents come from all different backgrounds and lifestyles, and no two families have encountered the exact same circumstances on their path to choosing adoption. More than half of the children waiting in foster care for adoptive homes are 8 or older, 30 percent are 12 or older. There are a million good reasons to adopt, but there are also some other reasons that you should give some thought to before adopting to make sure you are entering the process emotionally prepared and ready to give the best life you can to the child you adopt. This will inevitably lead to greater issues down the road and will negate the positive intentions and spirit in which the adoption […] While altruism is certainly beneficial to the world, it will not sustain you and your family through all the difficult parts of raising a child. You cannot have biological children for whatever reason and you turned to adoption because it’s just another wonderful way to create a family. Adoption, much like anything else, can be and is done for completely the wrong reasons. It’s not a decision that should be made lightly and certainly not one to be made just because someone you know had a good experience with it. The desire to give a child a family is another positive reason. Here are some of the reasons why adoptive families choose to adopt a child. 1. Often, one side chooses to adopt a baby considering it as a marriage-saving decision. You want to “save” a baby. The Origins And Reasons For Transnational Adoption 1057 Words | 5 Pages. However, it’s important that you are equally as excited for a new child to join your family, and not just making this commitment for your son or daughter’s sake. Angel Adoption, Inc. is an independent contractor and provides services under the supervision of Lutheran Child and Family Services of Illinois, License #012998, One Oakbrook Terrace, #501, Oakbrook Terrace, IL 60181; 708-771-7180. Desire to give a child a family ... You also need to be financially secure in order to be able to adopt a child comfortably. If you know that adoption offers a tax credit, you may think that adopting a child can provide you helpful financial reimbursement. Genetic / Medical Reasons It is not uncommon to find couples suffering from thallasaemia or any other high-risk genetic problems or incurable diseases deciding to adopt a child … Looking back on conversations with other adoptive parents and my own experiences with adoption and foster parenting, I feel that there are truly five solid reasons for wanting to adopt a child. Choosing to adopt a child is not a way to “repay a debt” to society or to indulge martyr tendencies. Therefore, they decide to adopt children an unfortunate child – which is, in fact one of the most touching ways of serving a social cause. Because of this, every hopeful parent’s motivations will be slightly different. The orphanages were questionable; children were placed first locally, then nationally, and it was only then, when they were often several years old, that Americans could adopt them. They may not be able to have children of their own, due to infertility or disability. The vast majority of adoptions are successful and the experience of ordinary family life gives children the opportunity to … While everyone may have their own motivation to explore adoption, the core of the desire for a family to adopt … Only you and your spouse can decide whether adoption is right for you. Saving children. Then you ought to adopt - and not create - a child to love. Convenience. Save a marriage. Adoption is a difficult, lifelong journey for all involved — adoptive parents, birth parents and adoptees. They likely share the feelings you do and can help you through them. But, just as having a child naturally will not solve marriage difficulties, neither will adopting a child. The Celebrities Are Doing It seems like a joke (and possibly a way to up SEO by name dropping), but perhaps there are people who approach adoption for that reason; I don't know any though. Is Adoption the Right Choice For Your Fa ... your partner isn’t totally ready to adopt, Closed or Open Adoption? The women who choose adoption are not monsters who would endanger their children; they are women who make the selfless and loving choice to give their child opportunities they may not be able to provide themselves. Given the large number of orphaned children in the world, I can see no reason why people should create children. Your email address will not be published. While there are plenty of great and beautiful reasons that people wish to adopt, there are also misguided and even harmful reasons, as well. What is the "wrong" reason(s) to adopt a child? © American Adoptions Blog 2021. While adoption is generally viewed as a largely positive period of time in a person’s life, as with most things, there are some people who might be doing it for the wrong reasons. 1. Adoption is a special journey that leads to an even more exceptional family. What are the right ones? As of January 2nd we currently have 3 spots available! Other people will choose to adopt to prove a point or to show how “caring” and “loving” they are, without actually having any interest in the children. Adding another member to your family should not be the first solution for a child who appears lonely. This will help you determine whether adoption is really the right path for your family. Even so, there are a few important things to recognize when you’re choosing adoption — and one of these is whether you are choosing adoption for the “right” reasons. Some families need help being able to do so but some stories are darker than that or we just need to be able to accept that they cannot instead of forcing the situation. All Rights Reserved. Remember, you can always call our adoption specialists at 1-800-ADOPTION to learn more about our agency’s adoption process. The following is a list of wrong motives to adopt: Because everybody is doing it (children should not be a fad) To have someone who will love you back (not every child may want to reciprocate your love and affection—initially anyway) Your biological clock is ticking (not good motivation for adoption) You see many people today (including celebrities) deciding to add to their family in this non-traditional way, breaking down the “normal” family stereotypes that exist. To relieve these fears, they may consider bringing another child into their home through private infant or foster care adoption because they are unlikely to have another child naturally. I lived my adopted parents, but never felt liked I belonged. Infertility struggles can take their toll on a marriage, just as any other hardship can. At Motherlode, lead writer and editor KJ Dell’Antonia invites contributors and commenters to explore how our families affect our lives, and how the news affects our families—and all families. However, unless you choose an option like foster care adoption, your adoption process will cost you much more than you would receive with the adoption tax credit. Some adoptive parents choose to adopt a child because they are infertile (medically unable to bear children). We wish you the best of luck moving forward! While adoption may not be your first choice to become a parent, it should not be something that you feel resigned to as your “last chance.” Adoption is a difficult journey and, if you choose this path because you feel like it’s something you “have” to do to have children, you won’t have the optimism and positivity to get through those difficult times. However, deciding to adopt simply because it seems like “the thing to do” is a terrible motivation. Hi, Josephine — Here are just a few of the reasons why people choose to adopt: https://www.americanadoptions.com/adopt/why-people-adopt Hope that answers your question! Article by Kriti Rathore, September 12, 2014. Transnational Adoption Transnational adoption - “the legal transfer of parental rights and responsibilities from a child’s birth parent(s) or other guardian to a new parent” (Bureau of Consular Affairs 2017) across national borders - is a widely disputed, yet prevalent practice of the past half-century. Your email address will not be published. As adoptive parents, if you have an interest in helping a child heal from past grief and pain, whether this comes from abuse, neglect, being abandoned, or orphaned, then you have the right motivations for adopting a child. Angel Adoption, Inc. provides marketing and advertising services that assist biological parents considering adoption and prospective adoptive parents to connect with each other, and provides support and referral services throughout the process. Not true. You have a wonderful relationship and you want to raise a baby since you feel ready to become parents. Required fields are marked *, Call anytime, an adoption professional is here to help. Adoption is more than a passing craze; it’s a lifelong commitment to your adopted child and to their birth parents. When we ask this question, then the very first or simple answer is infertility, Right? Adopting a child is a great commitment and not one that should be made if you feel stuck on your own or in need of companionship. But as I once heard a wise man say, the only thing worse than a family that should adopt but doesn't, is a family that shouldn't adopt but does. That does not mean all should adopt nor does it mean everyone should have children biologically or care for them if they are unwilling or unable to do so. Top 10 Reasons to Adopt a Kid. Chris and Jane are both officers in the Metropolitan police, and have four children, who were aged 25, 22, 12 and nine when the couple decided to adopt. If you are lonely, consider joining a new activity or getting a pet before you decide to bring a lifelong member into your family. Some people might think that a child will change everything that seems to be wrong. To Help A Child In Need – Some families adopt because they personally know a child in need. Talk to your partner and explore what this process can bring to you both and make sure you aren’t motivated chiefly by any wrong reasons to adopt. The article was titled Wrong Reasons to Adopt a Child and listed out seven reasons. However, we do not believe that every family is meant to be an adoptive family. The Child Adoption in India is a very personal or emotional decision of parents. Parents whose children are growing up and leaving home can be frightened by the upcoming changes, especially if they are a stay-at-home parent whose job was taking care of their child for the last 18 years. Similarly, if you have an only child, adoption is not the go-to answer for loneliness for them, either. I never gave it much thought until now. But there are some wrong reasons to consider adoption that you should be aware of.. People choose adoption for a host of reasons. If you’re not sure whether adoption is right for you, you can always speak to an adoption specialist at 1-800-ADOPTION to learn more about the process and discuss your reasons to adopt. If you have grown in a loving and caring family, it is sure that that is the only thing you want for your baby to have. If any of the wrong reasons to adopt below describe your sole purpose for pursuing adoption, it may not be the best option for you at this time. Some people adopt to claim a boost on their tax income. Children over 18 will usually be DBS checked, as will any other adult member of your household. Here are some of the common reasons to adopt a child today: 1. Our 2020 Winter Wonderland Photo Contest Winners! Children enter the foster care system through no fault of their own, usually as a result of abuse, neglect and/or abandonment. Children have many ways to make friends and find companionship, like through school and other activities. 4 Things for Birthmothers to Consider, BM Info Request Confirmation page (Ultimate Guide), AP Info Request Confirmation page (Ultimate Guide). Adoption is a process that takes full consideration of both parties in a relationship. That’s not to mention all of the expenses you will need to pay for at least the next 18 years to give your child the life they deserve. Our editorial team sat down with AdoptTogether mom Tacy Riehm to discuss some of the misguided reasons that parents have adopted in the past. 1) You have lost a pregnancy or a child and think adopting will heal that wound Complete our free adoption application. We're all living the family dynamic, as parents, as children, as siblings, uncles and aunts. If you think that by adopting a baby you are going to save him or her, that is indeed a wrong reason. It falls into the same category of “saving” a child. Children don’t need to be brought into a family that thinks saving is what they need. It got me thinking what are the wrong reasons to adopt? Just as there are countless reasons people choose to have a baby, there are numerous reasons you might choose to adopt. Questions from Adoptive Families: “Will COVID-19 Affect the Number of Pregnant Women Choosing Adoption?”, Questions from Adoptive Families: “Will COVID Restrictions Prevent Me from Meeting the Baby at the Hospital?”, 20 Virtual Gifts for Adoption Triad Members, How to Enter Our Winter Wonderland Photo Contest 2020, Questions from Adoptive Families: “Do I Need to Get a COVID Test Before Traveling for Placement?”, Questions from Adoptive Families: “Why Are the Birth Mother’s Friends and Family Asking to Meet Us?”, What American Adoptions is Thankful for This Year, 7 Holiday Gift Alternatives for Anyone Touched by Adoption, Empathy & Its Role in Parenting an Adopted Child, 7 Questions to Ask When Looking for an Adoption Therapist, 5 Tips for Talking to Your Child About Their Birth Family. if it is a good family, then undoubtedly yes. I hear people saying right or wrong reasons to adopt in a lot of questions. Adoption is more popular than ever — which is great! But do you know there are a lot of other reasons that convince couples to Adopt a Child. It’s always wonderful to want your child to have a sibling, whether through adoption or another family-building process. Many couples think “Why not adopt a child? If you go into adoption thinking that you will be “saving” a child from a disastrous situation, you need to learn more about the adoption process. Some pre-adoptive families may feel pressure from friends or family members to adopt a foster child who has been placed in their home. 7 Reasons To Adopt A Child. Adoption should be a family-building process that you’re 100 percent excited for, rather than just your last option. Not sure where to go or how to ask for help. Take the first step by filling out our free adoption application. Nothing could be further from the truth. We believe that every child deserves a loving family and a safe home. 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